Interview with Artist Lauren Hana Chai
“If I could put these emotions into words I would be able to tell you better about what they would be, but I can’t, therefore I paint. ”
First of all, thank you so much for your time and for agreeing to do this interview! We really really love your work, the strength of it and the sexuality, but more than that, there’s an incredibly emotional sensitivity that really resonates in each piece. Can you tell us about what your intentions are for your work, and what would you like your viewers to take away from it?
Emotionality is always at the core of my work, whether it is titillating, awe-inspiring, disgust, or more often than not, a conflicting emotional soup of it all. As long as the viewer feels strongly one way or another about my work, I feel like I’ve done my job.
You talk a lot about spirituality and your spiritual experiences. How have they changed your life/outlook and how do they influence the mythological aspects of your work?
As much as I like to talk about spirituality, I don’t necessarily like calling myself a spiritual person as some people’s image of me could be that of an incense burning, green eating, yoga hippie who greets everyone with namaste. Nothing against yoga hippies! But that’s just not me. Spirituality is in my life because I am not put together at all. I am by nature, a ball of chaos. I didn’t take a lot of personal responsibility when I was younger and as I’m approaching 30, it’s about time that I tried to figure that shit out. Being humble, grateful, having respect for living and non-living beings, surrendering myself to faith and love, letting go of attachments, moving forward from my past, bringing in the light to my shadow side. It’s easier to call these ‘spiritual’ practices versus one practice such as christianity, hinduism or shamanism, but really I think bringing structure into one’s life is universal and goes beyond subscribing to a dogma.
The symbols I paint frequently, such as the Korean peach and sacred fungus, are tied to symbols of longevity in Korean classical folk paintings. Back then, these paintings were limited to high-class wealthy merchants to enjoy. I paint these symbols today for everyone to enjoy, and I truly feel that I am giving my blessings to the person I am painting as I usually paint people who are close to me. More than just an image, it is an energy.
Do you see any connections between some of your more personal pieces about your own life journey and the larger statements your work has made about sexuality and politics?
Absolutely, it is all connected. Having been raised by my traditional Korean grandparents in the United States, (a polar-opposite culture), I spent a lot of time questioning my identity, heritage, and history, and painting has been my therapy throughout it all. Sexuality was shamed growing up and so as I was exploring it in my personal life, as an art student it exploded in my work as well. I wasn’t ashamed anymore, I was free. Especially because I was living in San Francisco at that time, which is kink central, I felt at home with my fellow freaks. Later my work developed from painting things such as a close-up of my friend’s spread wet pussy to more layered concepts which still involved sexuality one way or another. For example ‘American Pie’ is a depiction of the racial makeup of the U.S. which involves everyone either fucking or fighting. Each person in this painting is rendered out to show their individuality. This piece accompanies another painting ‘Korean Pie’ (unfinished) which in contrast highlights South Korea’s unity and nationalism. As a Korean American, I live in this grey area and see the pros and cons of my different cultures and beliefs.
What do you see as the largest struggles of your work as an artist?
Keeping a lid on my ADD and wanting to constantly transition in my artwork. Speaking completely in terms of the art business world, constantly changing your work is not good. I used to have a lot of struggles with some galleries as a student and right after graduating. Now I’ve learned to keep that lid loose and I have found a way to work in a series of works, spread concepts out and transition slowly.
What do you believe is the role of an artist in society, especially one who works in the margins and is a member of the LGBTQ community?
Painting your personal truth, no matter what it is. I honestly don’t really think about what my role is as an LGBTQ artist in this society but rather just focus on developing and constantly bettering myself as a person and an artist. It’s only when I hear from other people, usually Asian American women or LGBTQ people who take the time to tell me how much they relate to me through my work, that I think “Oh hey, I did something here”. For someone to never have met me, look at my painting and tell me that they get it, that that’s their life too, it’s really an amazing feeling.
“My innocent intentions became a catalyst for people to project their own perceptions of sexuality. ”
How has your art influenced your perception of sex, and vice versa?
As I mentioned earlier, a sexual explosion happened in my life and thus in my art and during that time I painted these subjects purely out of freedom of expression, embracing myself and not caring what anyone thought. After a while I questioned a lot of what kind of message I am putting out there painting such explicit paintings as a woman. Many people thought that my paintings were done by a man and were always surprised to see that I was a woman. I’ve butted heads with some of the more conservative feminists who claimed I was objectifying women. My innocent intentions became a catalyst for people to project their own perceptions of sexuality. For a while I was in fuck it mode but then I even doubted myself thinking that people will only like my art because the paintings are sexual and I was known as that erotic painter. I switched gears and was simultaneously exploring my identity a lot at that time as I was finally dealing with abandonment issues from my mom going missing when I was 11. I painted my Last Known Locations series which were 6 paintings of 6 cities of my mom’s actual last known locations..and I think it should go without saying that they weren’t sexy at ALL. After this dark turn, light entered my life and I started painting about my Korean culture and history in bright explosive colors. However, I found that I couldn’t get away from the eroticsm. Sexuality creeped back into these paintings as well but now in the form of painting about the Korean comfort women who were sexual slaves getting raped, or even painting about my own sexual abuse. Or in more subtle ways with a sexy exposed muscular back of a strong Japanese woman with the words “Otoko Masari” (basically meaning tomboy in Japanese) written above her. Or my paintings now of sexually suggestive poses of women eating these sacred fungus. There are many sides to my sexuality. I’ve embraced eroticism in a different way now and I don’t regret anything.
You talk a lot about how your work is about emotion… what emotions do you think your art conveys, both to you and to viewers?
It’s a spectrum of emotions, really. Some paintings convey empowerment, some defeat. Sometimes excitement or anxiety. Usually there’s some kind of struggle going in such as in my recent series “The Little Death” where there is a play between sex and death, the desire to live forever but also the inevitable return of our bodies to nature. If I could put these emotions into words I would be able to tell you better about what they would be, but I can’t, therefore I paint.
You’ve mentioned your experiences with DMT as well. How much have those experiences informed your art, and how?
My trip reminded me that love can solve everything. It’s a grandiose statement and ultimately not true, but also kind of true. Love is not just a significant other, it's a belief in morals, ethics, respect for your fellow human. It’s building a life and striving towards living a life of love that helps move this world forward. Love creates. I wanted to portray that message onto canvas and so I started a triptych called Souls In Motion which is not the exact depiction of what I saw and experienced, but more of a positive message inspired by my trip. In short, it is a Korean mythological folk version of Hieronymus Bosch’s “Garden of Earthly Delights” which rather than painting about hell, depicts how we can heal from fear.
What are the biggest sacrifices that you’ve made for your art?
Without a doubt money and financial stability. I’m not so much of a starving artist now but I’m definitely still broke. I can’t go on fancy trips or buy a lot of new clothing but I’m very good at window shopping! It’s money in, money out. Any art sales go straight back into buying supplies or paying bills etc. I’ve had to adapt to a minimal lifestyle and it might sound bad but I honestly enjoy it, less things equals less clutter and less stress in my life. Whatever it takes to be able to paint what I want everyday and I’m a happy woman.
“Remember that you are not separate from your art, art is an extension of you.”
What is something you’d like other women who enjoy/do art to know?
If you’re pursuing art as a career, the smart thing to do is get a part time job. Have some stable income coming in to supplement your art. Remember that you are not separate from your art, art is an extension of you. Also writing things down helps, keep a notebook to organize your reflections and thoughts on your art. Ultimately do what makes you happy!
PS. Please feel free to talk about anything you’d like to, along with this, or if you want to drop anything about future projects!
I have a mini solo show coming up in LA at Thinkspace Gallery on June 27th called “The Little Death”. Other than that you can stay up to date on all my art on Instagram as I post there pretty frequently.
Follow Lauren Hana Chai on Instagram here, and find her incredible work for purchase at her website here.
